Ask Away

Many parents have questions before having a child embark on the path to learning an instrument. It is good to have questions! Better to ask than to always wonder. Here are some common questions people ask about music lessons.

Q- Do we need our own instrument?

A- Yes. You can rent or buy, but your child needs one in your house so they can practice daily.

Q- Why are private lessons so expensive? I want to find the cheapest teacher I can.

A- The reason is found in the title, private lessons. You have a teacher who is spending one-on-one time with only your child, crafting the entire lesson to their needs, helping them understand everything the best that they can. A highly qualified teacher is often more expensive because of their experience. You don’t necessarily want just the cheapest quote.

Q- I want my child learning classic rock/”favorite genre” type music right away. Can we skip the beginner-sounding music?

A- Well…. not really. If they are a brand-new beginner, some “beginner-sounding” music will be necessary. There are probably teachers out there that can start a student out on whatever they want, but they likely won’t be teaching the student to read music, which is an essential skill to becoming a musician, if you think about it.

Q- I have a piano app on my phone/tablet. Can my child use that to practice for piano lessons until we see if he likes it enough to buy a real piano?

A- Good question, but NO. A huge, important part of the first lessons on piano is learning to have correct hand position while pressing down keys, that are the correct distance apart. You must have a piano or keyboard for them to practice on.

Q- Weekly lessons seem expensive/time-consuming. Can we do every other week?

A- In my experience with over 150 private students, it has been proven again and again that weekly lessons are the best way to go. When a student is allowed to go every other week, what most often happens is the student doesn’t practice much at all the first week he is “off,” and when he goes to practice that second week right before the lesson, he has basically forgotten everything the teacher discussed in his previous lesson. He makes almost no progress.

Q- How long will learning to play an instrument take? Or, When will she be done learning to play [instrument]?

A- If you really want to know, they will never be “done.” There is always another level of better playing they can achieve. There will always be another piece to learn. Now, not every student wants to or needs to go to become a concert artist, but to get to a level of proficiency and independence, it will take several years of lessons from a good teacher. (And lots of practice!)

Q- My child wants to become a music teacher and/or be a music major in college. How can they prepare for that?

A- Being a music major takes a lot of discipline. You have to like practicing… a lot: 1-2 hours daily practice at minimum at most universities. So make sure they are used to practicing now.

-Ask their teacher what they suggest. A good teacher will know how to prepare students for college auditions.

-Get your child into some music theory studies. They don’t have to know everything about music theory, but knowing basics will help them immensely!

- Have them perform as often as possible for family and friends. Performing is a huge part of being a music major.

Q- I think my child has aptitude for being a musician. Do you think they have potential?

A- Yes, any child that has a desire to learn and a has good teacher can become a musician, but only if they work hard and practice. A child that thinks they are good at music but never practices (because they think they don’t need to) will not become a musician. Just because someone says they have “talent” doesn’t mean they still won’t have to work hard.

Talent + hard work = results.

Q- How long until they will be able to play [difficult piece of music]?

A- Probably years, if they are a brand-new beginner now. Some famous pieces have been arranged into easier arrangements, so those will be reachable sooner, but the “real” versions of famous pieces will probably be several years away.

What other questions do you have about private lessons?

“Never let fear stop you from asking something you don’t understand or know. To pretend or to act as if you know is not a wise thing to do.” Catherine Pulsifer, inspirational author.

Image by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay

Music Lessons and Baseball

So private lessons are basically the same as sports; Little League for example.

Music teacher : head coach

Parent : assistant coach

Baseball practice : practicing done at home during the week

Baseball game : Music lesson with your teacher

Your music teacher is your head coach. You listen, respect, and obey. They know what is going on, and their job is to help you learn how to be the best player you can be.

The parent is the assistant coach. They guide the team when the head coach cannot be there. Or, when mom or dad say it’s time to practice piano, the student goes and practices piano.

Practicing at home during the week is like the baseball practices you attend during the week. This is where music lessons are harder than sports. When you go to sports practice, the coach is there, guiding you and encouraging you. And you make sure you go to practice so that (1) you stay on the team, and (2) you will know what to do during the game. When you practice your instrument at home, your “head coach” (teacher) is not there, so practicing at home is a big part of the Assistant Coach’s job.

Students, your weekly lesson is The Game. This is where you bring your best and lay it out. You want to win, so you have prepared the best that you could so you can Win for your teacher.

Parents, would you sign your child up for Little League, soccer, Girls on the Run, flag football, or any other sport, and then never take them to practices?

Step into and embrace your role as “assistant coach.” Make sure your “baseball star” is prepared and ready when you take them to “The Game” each week with the “head coach.” Don’t let another week pass where you realize they didn’t practice.

That’s not how games are won; that’s not how music is learned.

“There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure.” Colin Powell, former 4-Star US Army General, and former Secretary of State.

Image by Keith Johnston from Pixabay

When Your Child Arrives At a Brick Wall

The child starts lessons, and has stars in their eyes. They run home and practice every day. This new skill is fun! I can do it!

And then for some, the climb up the Mountain of Learning gets steeper, the concepts get more difficult, and the practicing doesn’t come so easily.

For others, they find the beginning material is quite easy, and they discover they can “coast” a bit, and not put in much time or effort. Then when the material gets more challenging, they are in a lazy rut and don’t know how to apply themselves to learn the new level.

When students stop wanting to practice and work, I call this the Brick Wall. There is always a way around or over it, but not all students will look for the way. Signs that your child are at the Brick Wall include:

- resisting practicing

- having dread on lesson day

- saying they want to quit

This is your moment, parents. As teachers, we can usually tell when the child is at their Brick Wall, but if they are a good actor and put on a happy face in lessons, we don’t always notice.

If your child refuses to practice at home, please tell your teacher.

If your child has lost their interest in learning the instrument, please tell your teacher.

If they want to quit entirely, please tell your teacher.

We can’t help what we don’t know, but knowing what the issue is can help us redirect our focus in the lessons.

If the student doesn’t like the pieces in the book, we change books.

If the student is tired of classical and wants to try jazz, we can try jazz.

If the student doesn’t want to practice their pieces, we find pieces that they like.

If the student needs more variety in lessons, we can bring more games and activities.

If the student wants to quit, we can ask them what they would like to do in lessons to keep going.

If the student needs less structure in lessons, we can be more flexible and spontaneous.

But sometimes, that information can only come from you, the parent. Please help us help your child get around their Brick Wall. And once they find their way around it, students generally enjoy playing and learning again. Please don’t let them quit the first time they ask! Involve the teacher in what is going on so they can be part of the solution. As a teacher, it is easy to “get in a rut,” and changing things up are good for us too.

“Be of good cheer. Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find a joy in overcoming obstacles. Remember, no effort that we make to attain something beautiful is ever lost.”

Helen Keller

Image by Tyke Jones from Pixabay

Ten Ways to Become Your Teacher's Favorite Family

1. Get that kid to practice. Seriously, this will give you many many brownie points from your teacher.

2. Pay on time, the way they ask. If they ask for payment on the first of the month, you pay on the first of the month.

3. Let your child answer the questions the teacher asks them.

4. Understand that if you need to take a break from lessons, your teacher cannot always give you the same timeslot when you come back. Many teachers have waiting lists and will fill that spot instantly.

5. Respect the place where lessons happen. If lessons are in the teacher’s home or studio, don’t allow younger siblings to run around or make loud noise or messes. If lessons are held in your own home, make sure the designated room is clear of other children, is quiet, and free from TV distractions.

6. Respect the teacher’s makeup and missed lesson rule. If you are expected to pay for lesson time even if the student is absent, pay for their time. If they don’t offer makeup lessons, don’t ask for a makeup lesson.

7. Praise your teacher to your friends and family. Give them an online review if they have a web page or Facebook business page. When they feel that you appreciate them, they will go above and beyond for your family.

8. Respect their profession. Many people ignorantly assume that music teachers teach because it is fun and easy, that it is just for “fun money,” or that it isn’t a legitimate business or career.

9. Be on time: for lessons, for payments, for recitals, for forms to turn in.

10. Get your child to practice. Seriously.

Image by eommina from Pixabay 

About Practicing

 Let’s talk about the P word… Practicing!

Halloween is coming up, so this scary topic is right on time!


I’m joking. Practicing doesn’t have to be as scary or intimidating as it may sound.


Practicing is simply going home after your lesson and playing your instrument because you want to learn how to play your instrument. And you can’t learn to play your instrument if you never sit down and play your instrument. And the oftener you play your instrument, the easier it gets, and the easier your songs/pieces get. And then you get better and better and you play more and more fun music. And it’s all because you went home and played your instrument.


So how do you know what to play when you’re home? Open your lessons book(s) and find what pages your teacher assigned. If they write in a notebook, open that and read what they wrote. Play through all of your songs, and if you struggle in one spot, take a look and study it out. Try again. If it gets frustrating, it’s ok to put it away until tomorrow. But you make sure and try again tomorrow. And the next day. And the next.


You know Michael Jordan, the super-famous basketball player? The one who won 6 NBA championships and is worth over a billion dollars? He didn’t become a great basketball player because one day he woke up and realized he could suddenly play amazingly well. He said, “I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” He didn’t mess up once and give up forever. He tried again. And again. And again. And that is what you must do when practicing and learning how to play an instrument. Learn from your mistakes. Mess up. Try again.


Practically speaking, a practice session might go like this:
- open books, find assigned songs
- play through each song at least twice
- do any assigned theory

It might last a beginner 10 minutes. An intermediate player- 30 minutes. An advanced player-an hour. And it must happen most days of the week for it to count.


Parents, if you have to remind your child to brush teeth, take a shower, or put on their shoes before school, then they still need you to remind them to practice. Sit down with them and be involved. Have them teach you what they learned and give it your best shot. They will learn it so much better if you do this. Set a daily timer on your phone to help you remember to do it!


A wonderful resource to help parents get their kids to practice are these books:
101 Piano Practice Tips: How to get your Kids to the Keyboard! or the similar book,
101 Music Practice Tips: Practice Tips for ANY Instrument both by Tracy Capps Selle. Available on Amazon, these books have many clever tips for getting your child to practice.


“Practice isn’t the thing you do once you’re good. It’s the thing you do that makes you good.” 
Malcolm Gladwell (author and public speaker.)

Photo credit Natascia Jones

Being A Music Parent: Understanding Topics that Music Teachers are Passionate About

I am Natascia Jones: music teacher, parent, and life-long musician. I have a Bachelor's and Master's degree in Organ Performance, and have played violin and piano for most of my life. I have taught lessons on all three instruments and have taught over 150 private students. As I have taught and gotten to know wonderful families, I have come across common threads of misunderstanding, such as: if my child doesn't practice this week, it is okay because we were busy; or, the best way to end lessons is to "ghost" the teacher; or, if I choose not to come to lessons one week, I shouldn't have to pay the teacher.

I created this blog to discuss subjects that are not talked about enough in the music lesson world. If you are a parent of a child in music lessons, or want to be soon, the topics here will help you understand some of the ins and outs of this world. As a private lesson teacher, these are topics I wish I could discuss in depth with all my students’ parents, but cannot for want of time. This blog is for families (and teachers!) of any musical instrument, be it piano, violin, bassoon, flute, etc. Be warned, I use humor and sarcasm freely. Subscribe to get notified when I post new updates.

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